Self-Care for Valentine’s Day (no matter your relationship status)
How to prepare for Valentine’s Day to increase the chance of your needs being met.
Love it or hate it, there’s no avoiding the Valentine’s Day marketing everywhere you look right now!
If you are one of the people who truly feel that it’s an unimportant day then we encourage you to skip this blog and go do something else for your self-care instead! But if you are one of the many people who care about it, even a little bit, read on.
Valentine’s Day can be a real doozy for our emotions if the reality of the day doesn’t match our hopes and expectations. While there’s a stereotype that single people will find Valentine’s Day hard or even depressing, a lot of people in relationships can find it really difficult too - especially if their partner has different ideas about the day or if the relationship is going through a difficult phase.
No matter what your relationship status is, we think preparing for Valentine’s Day can be an excellent opportunity for really good self-care. Here are some ways of doing that:
Have a think about what’s important to you about the day and what needs you would like to have met.
Validate your needs, e.g., I want to feel loved on Valentine's Day and it's okay to want this, I want to spend quality time with my partner/friend on Valentine's Day and it's okay to want this, I want to receive my favourite flowers and it's okay to want this.
If your needs can potentially be met by someone else (e.g., partner, friend) - clearly communicate what you would like and need for the day. Expecting someone to mind-read very rarely works out. You’re much more likely to get what you want if you ask specifically for it.
If you can’t get your needs met by someone else, prepare for extra self-compassion. Look for ways you can meet your own needs, even if it’s in a different way.
If you expect the day could be hard for any reason - plan in advance how you can remind yourself of your self-compassion strategies on the day.
If there are any self-care plans you can put in place ahead of time, do so as soon as you can. We think every day is a good day for self-care, but Valentine’s Day can be an extra good day.
Preparing for Valentine’s Day can go a long way as an act of self-care.
